I find it hard writing bios for my social media accts.– is it just me? Passionate about people, beats, geeking on both HP and government policy… I think about sounds, planets, cheering others on… and the minute a label nears (“woman” “mom” “american” “dutchie” “bookworm” “basshead”) I’m limited. I’m claustrophobic.
Ever been in a store and witnessed a child meltdown? The parent is either a. trying to ignore, b. negotiating/pleading, or c. hoisting kid in prem and getting out quick. (yes, I’ve been ‘all of the above’ person).
Parenting can mess people up.
We think we’re calm, sane people, but kids blow that up. You get a new spectrum of emotions, including fierce protector, bottomless love, anxiety, grief,… add another child to the mix and watch anger jump off the Richter scale when you see one hurt the other.
Yes, that was me who clapped so hard and stood up shouting “Stop!” at my kids during a Hema breakfast outing. The restaurant went silent for a moment.
It can feel like a sliding scale between brain mush and losing your mind, but is something more profound going on?
Is it just me? Sometimes disappointment, frustration, or fatigue keep banging on the door. You’ve got a project, dream, plan, but it’s stuck. You wonder: Is it me? My skills or vision? Do I lack proper education or experience? Is my heart really in it?
I read about some fisherman who may have thought the same. They worked all night with nothing to show.
Encouraging memes can fall flat when you’re in the middle of a firestorm. My experience is that problems or stressors rarely come alone. I’m dealing with X, but Q is spilling over, and my heart is breaking about T (and D through K).. I’m not sure I’m going to make it about P….
Final post in #UnashamedList series. Written especially for youth navigating issues like sexual integrity, porn addiction, (sexual) abuse, etc. Series intro and full 10 Day list here.
Sex was a massive part of my youth. I’ve shared snapshots of how hard it is being sexualized at an early age throughout this series. I’ve come out about the insidiousness of porn, upsides of “waiting,” and consequences of just doing everything you think is right.
But everything is more complicated Today.
That’s me on my 17th Birthday. No Instagram, Twitter or Tinder back in the 90’s. No Selfies or Filters to daily challenge my self-esteem. If a party got crazy, any d* pics were probably taken with a throwaway camera. There was no Social Media to torch a reputation or courage.
And when I went through a “tomboy” phase, LGBTQ wasn’t even on the radar…
There’s so much pressure on youth today. Few places to just Be. #MadRespect for all walking through it daily…