10 Life & Sex Lessons Mom Never Told Me: #10. Sex = A-Bomb, for Better or Worse

Final post in #UnashamedList series. Written especially for youth navigating issues like sexual integrity, porn addiction, (sexual) abuse, etc.
Series intro and full 10 Day list here.


Sex was a massive part of my youth. I’ve shared snapshots of how hard it is being sexualized at an early age throughout this series. I’ve come out about the insidiousness of porn, upsides of “waiting,” and consequences of just doing everything you think is right.


But everything is more complicated Today.

That’s me on my 17th Birthday. No Instagram, Twitter or Tinder back in the 90’s. No Selfies or Filters to daily challenge my self-esteem. If a party got crazy, any d* pics were probably taken with a throwaway camera. There was no Social Media to torch a reputation or courage.

And when I went through a “tomboy” phase, LGBTQ wasn’t even on the radar…

There’s so much pressure on youth today. Few places to just Be. #MadRespect for all walking through it daily…

You’re so much stronger than you think…

Continue reading “10 Life & Sex Lessons Mom Never Told Me: #10. Sex = A-Bomb, for Better or Worse”

10 Life & Sex Lessons Mom Never Told Me: #2- More to Life than Sex & Filters

This is Day 2 from the #UnashamedList Series. Written especially for youth and young adults navigating issues like sexual integrity, porn addiction, identity .. Series intro here.


Who doesn’t want to be loved? Who never wanted to be desired? I’ve been married 15 years and still want to be wanted by my husband.

In Middle & High School crushing and flirting can consume much free time (even long after).

Is he looking at me..?  What did she say..?

You can be so self conscious. I remember getting picked on about my hair, or being new (we moved a lot). People can make fun of anything. I didn’t wear tanks until I was almost done with High School.

One day I just accepted my arms will never be those slim sticks I saw everywhere.

This photo may be from that day.

But now we’ve added filters and hyper non-reality to the mix.

With a click we can hate our own beauty multiple times a day. And don’t we all end up chasing decoys?


Yo, Angelina needs sleep too. And did anyone catch what they did to Bieber’s hands, back, muscles and, ahem, the rest… Continue reading “10 Life & Sex Lessons Mom Never Told Me: #2- More to Life than Sex & Filters”

WWVD? 9 Beautiful Life Hacks from Voltron, Legendary Defender

The new Voltron (Netflix) blows my mind. I never saw the original (ahem, Thunder Cats), but 30 years later with my own kids, I’ve been longing for cartoons with solid stories and, uh, steady volume. We even blocked a few “kids” channels since so much was like junk food.

But Voltron-Legendary Defender has been a revelation. Rich story lines, deep and diverse characters, 23 glorious minutes of adventure and self-reflection.

One day my little had a meltdown about biking to school. We were running late so my eldest had to bike ahead. I hated separating and spontaneously called out, “What would Voltron do?!”

That got me thinking, so here’s my top 9 Voltron – Legendary Defender Life Hacks for a little fun and encouragement.

Continue reading “WWVD? 9 Beautiful Life Hacks from Voltron, Legendary Defender”

Shine & Shadow: How to Stay in the Light without Throwing Shade

God-glimpses aren’t confined to churches, prayer or fasting. Sometimes (many times?) they can happen in the natural, every-day moments.

I biked with three of my littles one unnaturally warm winter day. The youngest sitting behind me piped up:  “Look, look!”

Continue reading “Shine & Shadow: How to Stay in the Light without Throwing Shade”

Love, Law & Christianized Hate: One Bible Verse to Flip the Script

What do you think? Is it possible for a religion claiming inspiration from a humble, foot-washing, dying-on-behalf-of-“haters”- God, to have followers preaching hate, exclusion, and oppression?

Sadly, it’s possible. Continue reading “Love, Law & Christianized Hate: One Bible Verse to Flip the Script”

Is Hell bigger than Love?

The gospel can be cut so many ways. “Good news” for a woman begging is different than for a rich Westerner, or trafficked boy. But concepts like unconditional love and freedom keep me busy.

I’ve heard many Christians stress about people needing to “convert” or “be saved” to avoid hell. Was it similar thinking that sparked the convert-or-die theology of the Crusades?

Continue reading “Is Hell bigger than Love?”

Taken From God’s Rib [Multimedia Post]

Is it so simple? We were enjoying an outdoor wedding and it was like heaven touched down– the weather, the people, music, everything was amazing. So much freedom and fun, especially for the kids. We stayed all night long.

When a speaker shared about the Adam/Eve story, full heart and humor, I got hit:

If Eve was made for/from Adam so he wouldn’t be lonely, maybe God made all of us for the same reason? [-click to tweet-]

God, lonely? Ridiculous! Blasphemous!

Ok, but here’s a question: did you ever experience a great place, delicious food, or sick beat and not want to share it with someone?

Continue reading “Taken From God’s Rib [Multimedia Post]”

You’re God’s One and Only…

My daughter dropped a pebble she found at a fair while we biked and it was a drama. Some days later I turned out small pockets and found more stones. I kept thinking of this post so went to revisit. Maybe the message touches your heart too. Enjoy.

Heart in Formation

My son is a self-proclaimed ‘collector of stones.’ When I see a driveway full of rocks, he sees treasure. He searches for favorites and shows me his joys, describing and identifying beauty in each one.

I’m always surprised how unique they are when I start looking, despite being just rocks.stones-this one is special-we re Gods One and Only_HeartinFormation

Does God see us and seek us like this?

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To the part of me that keeps screaming [Poem]

To the part of me that keeps screaming

To the part of me that keeps screaming,
Or is it wailing and on fire?
No one sees or hears you,
but I’m the witness.

Continue reading “To the part of me that keeps screaming [Poem]”

The Fourteenth Day: An Obscure Prophecy That Might Give Everything Purpose

I’m a bit bible nerdy and instead of skipping over peculiar texts, I sometimes dwell on them. It’s a quirk I’m trying to appropriate so here’s my take on a text you probably never heard preached in church: The fourteenth day.

It appeared during Moses’ instructions to Israel before the 10th and final, most gut-wrenching plague. Every first born was to be killed and this plague sparked the Exodus from Egypt.

Continue reading “The Fourteenth Day: An Obscure Prophecy That Might Give Everything Purpose”